As a child, my desperate, silent desire was to become a sex symbol. John Berger states in Ways of Seeing that “To be born a woman has been to be born, within an allotted and confined space, into the keeping of men...from earliest childhood she has been taught and persuaded to survey herself continually.” I have been cyclically cramming myself into and bursting out of this allotted and confined space my entire lifetime: embracing the male gaze then vehemently rejecting it. At the center of my practice is an examination of the relationship between internal feminine power and the male-dominated world.
As a sculpture undergrad at the University of Florida, I would create pink, gauzy installations, invite others in, and perform a role for them. Being a young woman, my work reflected my life; I had begun to question commercialism’s princess-pink branding of girlhood, and was experiencing a loss of innocence that comes with youth submitting to predatory culture. Paralleling the function of the predatory patriarchy, I cyclically preyed upon, killed, and resurrected my character “Pink Girl” through performance and video installation during these years.
My sculptural work in undergrad set the tone for my painting practice. Self-portraiture is at the core of both. My process begins with the performance of my body in front of a camera, in which I imagine emotional experiences as spaces filled with condensed movement. I capture these movements with a remote trigger and paint them for an external audience. My figures are unclothed, but they are fighting against the costume of a “nude.” I use my agency as a female creator to position myself in whichever crude, crumpled, or expanded posture that feels valid, and thereby position my practice in rebellion to the history of oil painting and the submissive nude.
The best way to keep in touch with my work is via Instagram.